


Toad the toad who was a human

by Anonymous



Category: Frog and Toad - Arnold Lobel, The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
Genre: Deliberate Badfic, Deliberately Bad Fanart, M/M, anti-otherkin prejudice, driving despite obstacles, friendships that are tested, menswear, such as not having arms in the traditional sense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-19 03:37:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3594897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frog and Toad are friends, but can their friendship survive Frog's ignorant intolerance of toad's otherkin nature? also, can a human trapped in the body of a toad drive a car safely? A story about following your dreams.  </p><p>Many thanks to the Chicago Museum of Natural History for their gracious assistance with frog anatomy!! accuracy is my holy grail of art!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Toad the toad who was a human

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gregorianpeas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gregorianpeas/gifts).



“but toad said Frog as he corressed his friends bulbous eyes and head affectionately, you cannot drive a car u are too small and your legs are the wrong shape.” 

Toad of toad hall turned his serious humanlike eyes on his best friend frog. “Frog my dearest,” he said gently yet bluffly, “I realize we have been the best of friends since the crimean war when I carried you from the battlefield in my arms, but I must insist – ”

“frogs do not go to war,” said Frog, “and you do not technicalyl have arms in that sense, which is a significant part of the automobile problem.”

“don't interrupt me Frog I am a landowner,” said Toad irritably. “Since the war, the bond between us has been insaperable, but though u are my best friend I must insist you respect my true nature and idenity as a human.”

“That is all very well to talk about,” said Frog, “and if it were only a matter of calling yourself a human and wearing waistcoats, I would be all for it. However, the design of the automobile is clearly – ” 

but toad wasnot listening there were tears in his eyes because he had put them there with an eye dropper to be able to cry more like a human 

then toad drove his car 70000 miles per hour and acxscidentally flew off the white cliffs of dover in a beautiful parabola of shining metal and gleaming sunlight to plunge fatally into the deepest sea. 

 

 

Luckily he remembered in time that he was a toad and hopped with full strength out of the car and back onto land.

Now do you see what I mean about cars, said Frog with affeciotnate exsasperation. 

“I see that you still do not respect my true soul nature,” said Tode, “and I am changing my name to better reflect that nature. From now on please refer to me only as Human or Mr. Human if you are being polite.” 

“that I cannot do,” sd frog, “for the name of Tode is too dear to me. It is the dearest of all names indeed of all the lovely sounds on this dear earth”

“then our friendship must be forever marred by your intolerance,” said toad sadly and hopped off to buy a new pair of spats.


End file.
